how to give a good handjob
- bop it
- pull it
- twist it
- harder
- better
- faster
- stronger
You pull your left hand in
You pull your left hand out
You pull your left hand in
And you shake it all about!Cha cha real smooth
none of you ever touch a penis
(via anotherspecintheuniverse)
Only my friends can eat off my food >.< Not even mommy!
Today is clearly text post day. I should have a text post day once a week. I’m gonna do it on days when no one’s on Tumblr so they can’t read my stupid, endless rants :D So……Mondays then?
oh & p.s: all people do is eat off your food! why would you want to be around people?
If by some cosmic irony I do happen to have children, and that child is a boy, I will name him Klaus…or Zachariah. Or Bob. Yeah, I like Bob. If it’s a girl, I would name her Celeste.
is solid proof that I’m gonna grow old and alone. I’m gonna be a dog lady because I absolutely hate having strangers/anyone outside of friends or family around me in excess. 1 or 2 is fine (in moderation lol) but that’s my limit. It’s just too noisy; I get flustered; I have to fake smiling which makes me uncomfortable; I have to talk about my life because everyone wants to know “what you’re up to“…just…BLAH! I wish social interaction wasn’t a necessity.
